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The Les Mis Anon Kink Meme, Round 6
exit pursued by javert
10littlebullets wrote in makinghugospin
Since LJ seems to have finally capitulated to the Russian government and is now subject to Russian anti-obscenity laws, I'm not going to take a chance on sudden deletions. The Les Mis kinkmeme now lives at https://lesmiskinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/. (Round 6 here.) Everything has been backed up there. The LJ kinkmeme will stay up, but is now closed to new comments.

Post Seine with a twist

(Anonymous)
Basically a Post-Seine scenario where, instead of Valjean and Javert engaging in intellectual and philosophical debate and befriending each other in spite of each other's differences and/or Valjean guiding Javert during his mental schism, they end up becoming the 19th century equivalents of Beavis and Butthead.

"Hey Valbutt, that duck has three boobs."
"Huh-uh, how many butts does she have?"

*Watching a convict being loaded on a cart*
"Hey Javert. That guy's your dad."
(Frozen) (Thread)

Re: Post Seine with a twist

(Anonymous)
Oh dear GOD

"I am Inspector Cornholio; I need TP for my bunghole."

Now I have this image of Javert calling Valjean a fartknocker and I
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Enjolras/Grantaire

(Anonymous)
Enjolras is riding Grantaire. They are arguing, because YOLO.

Finally, Enjolras gets fed up, gets off Grantaire's dick, turns around, and starts reverse cowgirling him, because this conversation is over.

Yeah.
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: Enjolras/Grantaire

(Anonymous)
I would crack fill if I had any literary talent~!
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Fill (Anonymous) Expand
Re: Fill (Anonymous) Expand
OP (Anonymous) Expand
Re: Fill (Anonymous) Expand
2012 movie verse:

Mme Thenardier sets out to seduce Valjean
(Frozen) (Thread)

Bahorel/Grantaire

(Anonymous)
Grantaire has a lot of body image issues (he's chubby, he has scars, his nose is crooked from being broken so often in fights, etc.)
Bahorel knows this, but he just thinks Grantaire is the cutest thing (he likes to cuddle and have his hair played with, his eyes are a pretty shade of blue, he has an adorable laugh, and so on) and Bahorel likes to tell Grantaire how cute he is as often as he can.

I just need a lot of fluff with them, because there's not enough of it.
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Re: Bahorel/Grantaire

(Anonymous)
+1
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sub!Combeferre

(Anonymous)
Doesn't matter who his dom(me) is.

Dom(me) loves to spoil Combeferre with new books and snuggles. Ferre gets a bit overwhelm with all the attention. It's nice, but it's a lot.
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Javert gets cuddles from everyone

(Anonymous)
Because he needs them badly.
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Re: Javert gets cuddles from everyone

I picture him standing there, as still as a rock, while everyone gives him a group hug and he's just like 'nuuuuuuuuu ;A;'
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Angel!Enjolras and Atheist!Grantaire

(Anonymous)
Enjolras is an avenging angel sent down with righteous fury. Grantaire still doesn't believe in God.

Kudos for a holy trinity of CCE being angels, but only Enjolras is required.
Modern AU makes more sense for atheist!grantaire, but I'm not picky.
E/R preferred, but a gen is no problem. +1000 points if Enjolras isn't allowed to fall in love because he's an angel but he does anyway. +9999 points if Grantaire is actually like, the messiah or something equally cracktastic and sacrilege.

I'm not religious, so you can't offend me with anything.
Sorry if that's a super long prompt, but honestly all I want is Angelras because I finally figured out how to pronounce his name...
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: Angel!Enjolras and Atheist!Grantaire

(Anonymous)
my kingdom for this fic
(also best prompt ever just because of that last line)
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread) (Expand)

porn star au

(Anonymous)
Porn star AU in which Enjolras is trying to create *art* and improve the industry. He is backed by Valjean, who used to be a huge (heh) star in the 80s. Valjean keeps trying to lock Cosette out of the porn industry, but she's a huge hit when she stars opposite Marius in one of Enjolras's indie porn films. Enjolras treats his crew with great dignity and respect, unlike other directors and producers like the Thenardiers, who ran their star, Fantine, into the ground.

Javert is still in the old industry, searching everywhere for his long lost costar, Jean the Jackedman. He doesn't want to star alongside anyone else (and he's a size queen, technicalities...) Or maybe he's a director who lost his muse. Either way, the important part is that he is still hunting Valjean. (If you manage to slip breadsports in there, as a joke or for real, I will marry you)

The Amis are all involved in one way or another: some write scripts some are actors. All I want is Grantaire in an off camera role, thinking Enjolras is rustling too many long established feathers. When either he or Enjolras decides to make his debut, the other protests strongly until the original opposite star gives the job to the complainer. Cue flustered stuttering, blushing, and fumbling through their roles. Make them chicken out if you want.

I'm very open to any pairings, but I'm fond of combferrexeponine, courfxjehan, mariusxcosette as background pairings. Obviously, I have put entirely too much thought into this AU. Feel free to deviate from any of this!
(Frozen) (Thread)

Re: porn star au

(Anonymous)
need this like i need air
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Marius gives birth to... a goat

(Anonymous)
Inspired by an earlyer prompt where someone thought I wanted an omega!Marius to give birth to a baby goat. Lets see that actually happen.

Everyone has come over to support Marius as he gives birth to his first child, the Amis, Valjean, his grandfather, Javert, the Bishop's ghost, everyone. But Marius's baby is a goat kid and he starts crying because Cosette thinks he's been cheating and she starts crying because she never told Marius that she is secretly a goat. Valjean gets confused and punches Marius. In the meanwhile the goat eats the oriental rug.
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: Marius gives birth to... a goat

(Anonymous)
Haha what the f*** Cosette as a goat just made my day
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Les Mis/Phantom

(Anonymous)
Javert is sent to investigate the disappearance of several stage hands in the allegedly haunted Opera Populare.

+ 1 trillion for Javert teaming up with Valjean as a kick ass, crime fighting duo.
(Frozen) (Thread)

Fill?: A Control (tentative working title) 1/?

I don't usually write, but I love Javert and PotO, so a small crack at this prompt??
Please input, I don't know if my writing is up to snuff, nor if I can complete a work... This might drag. OP, did you want a crossover or an AU? It can go either way at this point.

JVJ, MC, probably ER
TW: very minor non consensual drug use. Because kidnapping. Is that a TW as well? Sure. TW: kidnapping as a plot point.


He stepped up the marble stairs into the opera house. Madeleine, the patron, was waiting for him in his office. Javert believed that being prompt was always important in making first impressions, and this was a large one. As his first case in Paris as a police inspector, this case could define Javert's career. Too bad the evidence was all based on rumors and superstition... Still, he was determined to undertake this job with as much seriousness and professionalism he could muster.

The opera house was opulent. Golden statues framed the walls and Javert could glimpse the crystal chandelier hanging in middle of the theater through a set of double doors. On stage, a ballerina was spinning in a blue silk skirt. Stage hands bustled around behind her, painting sets and exchanging props. Javert could hear the shouts and music from the entrance hall. He could also see the black shadow balanced in the rafters.

Footsteps from behind alerted Javert to the presence at his back. Turning, Javert laid eyes on a tall gentleman making his way up to him. "Ah! You must be Inspector Javert!! My name is Madeleine, though you may wish to call me Jean. I was not expecting you for another ten minutes," the man swept his arm up at a staircase leading into the theater's offices, "Please, follow me. There is much to discuss which I'd rather not have in the open.

They found themselves in Madeleine's office, standing on opposite sides of the desk. "I hear there have been some disappearances backstage, and the stage hands believe the building to be haunted," Madeleine started. "My sources tell me of letters sealed in red wax skulls and accidents keep happening. I wouldn't believe half their stories, but my daughter was witness to certain events and was quite shaken."

"Witness to what events, may I ask, sir?" Javert prompted when it was clear Madeleine was lost in thought.

Twisting his white gloves in hand, Madeleine looked up and away before looking Javert in the eyes. "Her costar, Enjolras, was taken before her eyes. As I understand it, he has not been seen since."

At that moment, a great ruckus sounded from the stage. Yelps and squeals of joy and fright as well as reef was muffled through the doors. Javert flew from the room faster than Madeleine's shout of surprise. He dashed from the office through the red walled halls down into the theater, his legs carrying him swiftly to the stage. A mob swarmed around the center of the stage, humming like concerned bees.

"Clear the way!" He hollered over the commotion, "make way!" Madeleine was pushing behind him into the fray.

At the center was a man with fair hair and a flush on his cheeks. His eyes were glassy and rolled about his skull. Another was holding him steady while slapping his cheek, trying to get a coherent response. "Enjolras!" The man was saying, "Enjolras, where were you! Wake up!".

Tucked in Enjolras's waistcoat was an envelope. "Read it," was the only response his concerned friend could rouse from him. Javert plucked the envelope off his person and inspected the seal: a red skull. Flipping to the front he read in a sloping scrawl, 'Monsiuer Inspector'. Intrigued, he cracked the seal with care and read the letter silently to himself.

Inspector,
It has been brought to my attention that you have come to my roost with the aim of eding my fun. We can't have that.

If you would be so kind as to inform my dear patron that my salary is due, I would be most grateful.

Please remind the Pontmercy boy that Madeleine's daughter is currently off limits and his failure to abide by my curfew will cost him.

I return to you one dazed Enjolras, of whom I was obliged to spirit away on account of his loud mouth. If he decides to heed my warnings in the future, I may feel amiable towards the option of his friends' return.

Your humble servant,
OG
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread) (Expand)

Anyone here likes kpop? Anyone heard the song/seen the video for Illa Illa by singer Juniel?

I want something with the video for that song. Enjolras has a flower shop and gets visited frequently by Grantaire, who keeps buying flowers from the shop just because, they never talk. Grantaire is studying art and has a lot of drawings of Enjolras.

One day, Grantaire gets a scholarship to study art in another country, it's a great opportunity but he doesn't want to leave before confessing his feelings for Enjolras, so he goes to the flower shop with one of the drawings he's made of e and tells him that if he asks him to stay, he will, but e doesn't answer and just stares at him, so R feels disappointed and leaves, accidentally dropping the drawing.

E figures out what happened and leaves the shop to find R but he doesn't find him, he picks up the drawing and waits for R to come back, but years pass and he never returns.

tl;dr, Enjolras is deaf, so he can't hear it when R tells him that if he asks him to stay, he won't leave.

Edited at 2013-08-19 05:56 am (UTC)
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: deaf!e/artist!R

(Anonymous)
Oh my dear feels. I need this like I need air. +24601.
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: deaf!e/artist!R (Anonymous) Expand

e/R D/s Slapping

(Anonymous)
Enjolras and Grantaire get into a heated argument and just as Enjolras raises his hand to slap him he realizes how turned on Grantaire is getting...and then he realizes how turned on /he/ is getting.
Bonus points for bondage.
Modern AU or Canon era is up to you.
(Frozen) (Thread)

combeferre/grantaire slow burn

(Anonymous)
slow burn where they just randomly hang out because they have the same taste in music and watch the same musicals (headcanon says "once") and like the same books and grantaire doesn't realize he hasn't drawn enjolras in weeks and combeferre doesn't realize he'd begun cataloging body parts while studying for his med classes in terms of grantaire's body

until they do and it's magical

(tl;dr they don't realize they're falling in love until they do)
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: combeferre/grantaire slow burn

(Anonymous)
+1
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Leon the Professional AU

(Anonymous)
Can I have an AU where Cosette is Mathilda and Valjean, instead of becoming a good guy, become a hitman, so he's Leon. Idk, just watched it and reminded me of Les Mis. (As everything does.)
(Frozen) (Thread)

E/R ABO - Enjolras calls dibs

(Anonymous)
omega!Grantaire walks into the Musain and meets Les Amis for the first time. Alpha!Enjolras lays claim as soon as he sees him.

Or whatever the equivalent of calling werewolf dibs is.
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: E/R ABO - Enjolras calls dibs

(Anonymous)
Crying because all I saw as dibs was E peeing on R, like marking his territory...
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread) (Expand)

cheerleaders!les amis

(Anonymous)
cheerleaders au (based off bring it on: in it to win it which is technically based off west side story)

i just want grantaire and enjolras to be captains of rivaling teams at cheer camp (grantaire as the sharks captain because ~modern~ dance and enjolras as the jets captain because ~traditional~ cheerleading) and enjolras has an internal crisis because you can't want him he's the enemy

then tragedy strikes, half of both their teams get injured and the sharks and jets have to join together to defeat the flamingos (patron-minette??)

bonus if javert and valjean are coaches for rival camps

TL;DR BRING IT ON: IN IT TO WIN IT AU!!
(Frozen) (Thread)

Re: cheerleaders!les amis

(Anonymous)
"based off bring it on: in it to win it which is technically based off west side story" ...which is in turn based off romeo and juliet and we are reaching inception levels of this.

also, patron-minette as flamingos, omg. there is literally nothing i don't like about this prompt
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Javert, the worst bed mate ever

(Anonymous)
He's just impossable to sleep with, he kicks, talks in his sleep, steals the covers in winter and piles them on his bed mate in summer not to mention he likes to sleep literally on top of his bedmate. Fluffy or angsty or both.
(Frozen) (Thread)

Re: Javert, the worst bed mate ever

(Anonymous)
After lots of dallying, I will find time to write this. Does OP mind Modern AU with Quast!vert? If not, considered it filled (in time)
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread) (Expand)

Fill: Bedshaped 1/3 (Anonymous) Expand
Fill: Bedshaped 2/3 (Anonymous) Expand
Fill: Bedshaped 3/3 (Anonymous) Expand
Re: Fill: Bedshaped 3/3 (Anonymous) Expand
Re: Fill: Bedshaped 3/3 (Anonymous) Expand

College au, Les Amis, Valjean, Javert, crack

(Anonymous)
I really need a college au that's funny. I've read too many depressing stories, I just really want something that's funny. The crackier the better. Les Amis as a rowdy group of misfits who often ignore the wishes of their leader in favour of parties? Valjean who's a professor of religion or something? Javert as campus police who's obsessed with the professor who is surely that darn criminal who was a break and enter twenty years ago and never got brought to justice???

Please I just need 110% smiles and laughter and hilarity
(Frozen) (Thread)

So the Les Amis Texts From Last Night blog on tumblr paired Enjolras and Grantaire with this text exchange:

"TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT."

"I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext."

Anything with this, please. Enjolras is really bad at sexting? Grantaire winds up liking it? D/S relationship? Go wild.
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

SECONDDDDing cuz that post had me in stitches
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OP (Anonymous) Expand

e/R, Reincarnation, Incest

(Anonymous)
the first few time les amis find each other and remember the revolution, everything is good, and everyone is happy and alive.

then they started getting into pairs or threesomes because, hey they're gonna spend the rest of eternity together through reincarnations, why not enjoy it with someone you love?

it takes a few lifetimes but eventually everyone gets paired up, except for Enjolras and Grantaire, because they are stubborn as fuck.

So the rest of the amis try to help them get together, and they are almost getting somewhere, but then the next reincarnation comes, and Enjolras and Grantaire somehow became brothers.

THAT DOESN'T STOP LES AMIS FROM THEIR MISSION TO GET THEM TOGETHER, A FEW LAWS WON'T FOIL THEIR PLANS.

They keep trying to hook them up even though they're brother and it's really really awkward.

(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: e/R, Reincarnation, Incest

(Anonymous)
I will generally be on board with all incest prompts but this is such a great prompt i swear i will give you a pint of blood for it
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

Omega!Valjean/Alpha!Javert

(Anonymous)
Post-Seine. Valjean gets pregnant and is overjoyed. Basically, he bustles around happily and nests while Javert loves him up (and maybe fucks him into the mattress later that night).
(Frozen) (Thread) (Expand)

Re: Omega!Valjean/Alpha!Javert

Oh my, yes, I love you! *-*

But wait... Isn't he a little too old to be pregnant? D: Wouldn't that be risky?

I can just picture Javert being all "what are you doing up? Go back to bed! The doctor said you have to rest! No, put that pan down, I'm going to cook! No, don't you dare sweep those leaves, mister! No, here, I'll open the door for you, and dress you, and shower you and carry you around, you are in no shape to be doing anything!"
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

[Fill] Je t'aime [1/3] (Anonymous) Expand
[Fill] Je t'aime [2/3] (Anonymous) Expand
[Fill] Je t'aime [3/3] (Anonymous) Expand
authoranon says (Anonymous) Expand
Sub!Combeferre isn't used to having someone (in this case, his dom/domme) take care of him. He doesn't know how to ask for what he needs. So, when he needs, say, snuggles, he usually just curls up at his dom/domme's feet and hope they understand.

Bonus points if, when Ferre and his dom/domme are alone at home, he's only allowed to wear a collar.
(Frozen) (Thread)

I'm loving all the sub!Combeferre prompts lately, so I thought I'd add my own.

Sub!Combeferre is the sweetest little submissive ever. He's not loud, he just sits quietly at his dom's feet. He cooks and cleans and looks after his dom's health. But he's not used to someone wanting to take care of him. When his dom asks him if he needs something (hug, aftercare, the works), he's just "oh, I don't want to be a bother".

I dunno, I just thought it was a cute idea.
(Frozen) (Thread)

ER, unrequited!piningjolras

Enjolras has been in love with Grantaire since the momement they met. Like, Marius Cosette, love at first sight, loopy puppy dog love. Grantaire liked him too, but wrote him off as unattainable and sort of moved on. Read: hooks up and dates other people. This obviously is tearing Enjolras up inside. He sees R with other people and it breaks his heart every time.

I want Enjolras sobbing on Combeferre's shoulder and being hopeless after R comes to a meeting with another hickey E didn't put there. Make me sob. Angst angst angst.
It's up to the filler if ER gets together in the end.

TL;DR: ER, unrequited!piningjolras, oblivitaire, h/c platonic!e&ferre, all the angst.


Edited at 2013-08-20 01:58 am (UTC)
(Frozen) (Thread)

Any/Any or Gen

(Anonymous)
Amis meet the actors that played them in the 2012 movie.
(Frozen) (Thread)

No actor RPF on this kinkmeme, sorry. Check the rules for more detailed info.
(Frozen) (Parent) (Thread)

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