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The Les Mis Anon Kink Meme, Round 6
exit pursued by javert
10littlebullets wrote in makinghugospin
Since LJ seems to have finally capitulated to the Russian government and is now subject to Russian anti-obscenity laws, I'm not going to take a chance on sudden deletions. The Les Mis kinkmeme now lives at https://lesmiskinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/. (Round 6 here.) Everything has been backed up there. The LJ kinkmeme will stay up, but is now closed to new comments.

Everyone goes on Dr. Phil

(Anonymous)
Because seriously, apart from Marius/Cosette is there one single well-functioning relationship in this entire fandom
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Re: Everyone goes on Dr. Phil

(Anonymous)
Seconded :)
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Javert the Amis revolutionary

(Anonymous)
Javert is sent to infiltrate Amis d' ABC much earlier on, while they're still planning in the Musain. Perhaps because of his background, he is allowed in and becomes one of the set. Gradually, the preaching of injustice and unfairness begins to make an impression, triggering the same dicotmy as in canon.

This time though, he doesn't head for the seine, but embraces the cause, to the point that he feeds wrong info back to the police.

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Re: Javert the Amis revolutionary

(Anonymous)
This deserves to be its own thing. It's probably out there somewhere.
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He Had It Coming

(Anonymous)
Because Samantha Barks did "Chicago" at the Hollywood Bowl.
Here's "The Cell Block Tango" (aka He Had It Coming) - www youtube com//watch?v=tofNMRrtY4U
and here's a comment to it, that's actually funny (yes, those are super rare, but exist):
I met Marius Pontmercy about a year ago and we hit it off right away. We'd hang out, he'd go to the Cafe Musain, get a drink, talk about revolution, y'know. The usual. Anyway, one day, I'm bringing him this letter from this girl he likes and I get shot climbing over the barricade! I die in his arms and the first thing he does is sing about this other girl! So, I'm watching from my little cloud up in heaven and I see him get shot. He didn't die, but still. HE HAD IT COMIN'.
Let's do something with this (if I was Eponine's ghost, you bet I'd be responsible for him landing in the sewers).
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Javert's huge cock

(Anonymous)
Javert has a huge cock, it's the reason he is always the bottom when he has sex. Valjean desides he wants to be fucked by Javert, so he trains himself to take larger and larger things until he jumps Javert one night and rides him silly.
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Re: Javert's huge cock

(Anonymous)
Oh please.
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Eponine and Montparnasse friendship

(Anonymous)
I'd love something in which these two are friends. Where he'll come over and they'll talk and drink and laugh. Where he tells her that he's a better friend than Marius will ever be, and that she should ditch his ass, and she tells him that he should probably stop killing people. Where he gives her fashion advice and she gives him an alibi.

I'd prefer it if it wasn't shippy, where it's just the two of them being supportive of each other and always having each other's backs.
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Re: Eponine and Montparnasse friendship

(Anonymous)
This is too cool.
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Face blind!Enjolras

(Anonymous)
Enjolras is face blind, so he keeps labeled photographs of people on his phone.
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Re: Face blind!Enjolras

(Anonymous)
Seconded! Or canon era or any era, really.
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(Somewhat cracky) FILL (Anonymous) Expand

Javert is afraid of water

(Anonymous)
Serious, sexy or cracky, doesn't matter.
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R as a sassy satirical musician

(Anonymous)
listening to flight of the conchords today and came across this gem:
www*youtube*com/watch?v=EmLHOGT0v4c

and subsequently remembered THIS gem:
www*youtube*com/watch?v=Q8chs2ncYIw



and now all i want is R being a comedian that writes a lot of satire songs, trying to get people to change or just for shits and giggles, and Enj just gets pissed off because he thinks he's making fun of them (tbh he kind of is).

if you want to write in shipping, i'm an e/R fan.
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Re: R as a sassy satirical musician

(Anonymous)
Teehee
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slightly based on my mad fat diary (ok more than slightly)

grantaire disappears for a few months and everyone misses him and then he comes back and tells them all he was traveling the world and saw all sorts of beautiful things and beautiful women etc

when in reality he was in rehab/psychiatric hospital/whatever

and like maybe he was only friends with a couple people in les amis so when he comes back they're part of this new group and that includes enjolras so he sort of joins and he and enjolras do not get along but he has a huge crush on him and he just feels so inadequate because he thinks he's a fuck-up and he's also pretty sure enjolras hates him

then somehow his group of friends, new and old, find out why he was gone for a few months and enjolras shows a side of himself he's never shown before and it turns out enjolras had a crush on grantaire too but isn't all that great with words

bonus points if the author does a variation of the scene in which finn writes I love you on rae's back when he finally admits his feelings for her (www*youtube*com/watch?v=F57Sbk1DErk)
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frick i think this is one of the best prompts i've seen on this meme. someone really needs to write this.
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Support through a panic attack

(Anonymous)
I know we have a few of these prompts but it's 4 am and I'm waiting for my tranquilizer to kick in because the past three hours have amounted to nothing but the build up to a panic attack so basically

Anyone struggling with a panic attack--preferably the slow rising kind, where you go "I'll be fine" for a bit and then ten minutes later it jumps back up and the crushing anxiety just keeps climbing--until someone else (friend, partner(s), whatever) recognizes something is up and does their best to help. Or heck just anything related to any of that would be great. Please. Pretty, pretty please. I'm sorry.

(Also I am 100% down with any characters, but I do really dig Combeferre if someone's like maybe but where start??)
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Re: Support through a panic attack

(Anonymous)
I hope you're feeling better! That's a really shit situation to be in.

I'll start writing and will hopefully be done by Friday?
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Sucidal!Jehan

(Anonymous)
Jehan writes small suicide poems and/or notes when he's going through hard times. The idea soothes him, in a way.
What he wasn't planning for was one of his friends (or partner) finding the notes and freaking out because they think he is going to kill himself.

extra points for
-- pulling in all of the amis because this is too heavy for the person to handle alone
-- finding he's been doing it for a long time because he dates the notes
-- grantaire flipping his shit ("no shut up you cant feel like this i am the depressed one you are not allowed to fall into the same shit i am in okay")
--------- crying (i dont care who just)

Make it shippy or gen however you want, have Jehan be as suicidal as you wish, OP just wants someone worrying over him
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Do want.
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É/E first kiss

(Anonymous)
Hey guys
Here is the thing, I have been having a migraine crisis for six days in a roll now and I think my head will explode soon in pain :(
Can I please have some Éponine/Enjolras first kiss fluff pretty please?
I would love if that was Enjolras' first kiss ever and if it was on his point of view, but if you want to make it on Ép's POV it is fine too. Just shamless fluff to make me smile :)
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Javert isn't at the barricade 'cause he got recruited by the R.I.P.D.

(Anonymous)
Rest In Peace Department crossover. Gen or J/VJ.
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Re: Javert isn't at the barricade 'cause he got recruited by the R.I.P.D.

(Anonymous)
Seconded. Bonus points if Vidocq winds up being his partner.
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Marius The Killer

(Anonymous)
Alright, so, what if Marius isn't just a loving dork that's been the subject of teasing from his friends for ages? What is he's a loving dork that goes around killing people?

Valjean and Cosette knows nothing of this, and believes that he's a good man, but Javert (somehow alive and in touch with Valjean, idk) gets suspicious.

Any ships are fine, I'd just really like a story where Marius goes around being a killer for whatever reason.
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Combeferre/subjolras/Courfeyrac

(Anonymous)
I'd really love to see an Combeferre/Enjolras/Courfeyrac threesome, with C and C co-dominating Enjolras. BUT, Combeferre is a very loving Dom who gives lots of praise and calls Enjolras a good boy and tells him how lovely he looks with 'Ferre's cock in his mouth, etc etc, and Courfeyrac is a big mean Dom who spanks him til he cries, and calls him a dirty slut, and makes him beg to be fucked, and so on. Would really love to see them both dominating him at the same time, so he's, say, bent over the bed sucking Combeferre off, and as ferre is praising him and brushing his hair back, Courfeyrac is behind Enjolras, fucking him with a toy, or spanning him, or whatever.

TL;DR Enjolras subs for gentle!dom!combeferre and harsh!dom!courfeyrac at the same time.
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Re: Combeferre/subjolras/Courfeyrac

(Anonymous)
*spanking. Fuck.
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Javert/Marius

(Anonymous)
Marius wants to thank Javert for helping his girlfriend's dad in some way or another so when they meet up at the barricade Marius 'rewards' the inspector with a blowjob. Javert is begging to be killed the whole time.
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R thinks he's the child from Sixth Sense (or maybe he's tripping...)

(Anonymous)
Modern day AU

Grantaire is a normal guy; drinks more than he should, yeah, but overall normal. He goes to an art college and is living in a crappy apartment that he can barely afford. So he gets a part time job as a waiter in a cafe- Cafe Musain. And the cafe seems to be haunted by men in their early twenties that only he can see and who are convinced they know him and that he was part of a revolution.

Grantaire's pretty sure he's had too much to drink. But it would explain the large amount of paintings he's created absent-mindedly of angels wearing red jackets and a barricade of furniture.

(Repost)
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St Trinians AU [repost from round 2]

(Anonymous)
Can we get a boarding school AU in here?

Enjolras is prefect/headboy and Grantaire is that kid who's always sneaking in alcohol. And then there's Courfeyrac, who's slept with half the school because he's so fucking charming and his room-mate, this socially awkward guy, Marius, who is dating their scaryass deputy headteacher's daughter. And then there's Jehan, that sweet poet, who braids people's hair and his boyfriend friend, Bahorel, who will kick your ass if you say anything bad about him. And there's Combeferre, who's just there trying to get everyone to study instead of getting drunk Grantaire or starting a protest about excessive maths Courfeyrac, that's not what Enjolras means by a revolution, Christ. And basically they're a group of friends, who 'study' and fuck shit up.

Meanwhile, the school inspector is trying to shut down the school because he has a grudge against Mr Valjean; everyone knows they're fucking. Or want to.
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Re: St Trinians AU [repost from round 2]

(Anonymous)
Haha oh my god this prompt is great. I'm going to have to re watch st trinnians now. Great movie ("what, You want to steal Scarlett Johansson?!") and possibly be inspired to write something.
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E/R, If I Didn't Have You (Someone Else Would Do)

(Anonymous)
Out of all the love songs in the world, none have spoken of Enjolras/Grantaire's entirely statistically unremarkable romance such as this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeZMIgheZro

(Or: E/R are in love. They're both terrible realists when it comes to romance and romantic gestures. It works.)
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Cosette beats up Javert

(Anonymous)
Cosette notices that her beloved papa's paranoia levels skyrocket when he notices a certain Inspector of the police shows up. She takes it upon herself to learn how to fight so she can defend her father from someone who undoubtedly wants to hurt him.

One day, she is startled awake by what sounds like a scuffle in her father's room, she grabs a weapon and runs to discover her father and the policeman fighting (fucking each other's brains out) and she jumps in to action, knocking Javert out and leading to a very awkward conversation with Valjean.

+1000 Cannon era, because Cosette doing Kung fu in a big, poofy skirt, a bonnet and wealding a parisol as a weapon makes me giggle.
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Re: Cosette beats up Javert

(Anonymous)
+1trillion for every flying jump kick Cosette performs.
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The reason why Combeferre is so smart? When he was a child, his father would beat/whip/otherwise physically assault him for even one wrong answer on his schoolwork.

Skip ahead to Combeferre's college years: he brings home a test on which he got a 99% and expects to be beaten by his Dom (any Ami). Cue Combeferre being very confused when he's instead rewarding for "being such a clever little boy".
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Oh my god. It's so sad but good and mate I'm probably bad for wanting this but damn its a good prompt. /I can totally see Courfeyrac praising Combeferre omg/
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Everybody fucks for the sake of the revolution.

(Anonymous)
That's basically it
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Combeferre is a complete douchebag while drunk

(Anonymous)
No one expects it because he's usually the most mature and cordial of the group, but when he gets drunk, he's incredibly rude and awful.
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grantaire is enjolras' dad's lover/fuck buddy/prosti??
to get revenge on his dad, enjolras plays with r/makes r fall in love with him, etc.
he does not expect to fall in love with r

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E/R Whipping Boy Reprompt

(Anonymous)
I found this prompt in Round 2 and was thinking of filling it!

"E/R, whipping boy

So both Enjolras and Grantaire like to mouth off and speak their mind and I imagine it would difficult to break that habit. Well, in an AU scenario (anything from fantasy to jailed instead of killed to classical era) through a twist of fate they are imprisoned and either:

1)Grantaire is made Enjolras's whipping boy. Enjolras is an important political entity or important person's son or they don't want him to be seen as a martyr or whatever. Every time Enjolras starts arguing or provoking their captors, Grantaire is beaten/caned/lashed/something worse? in front of him. (Also perhaps they know watching others suffer would hurt Enjolras more than getting punished himself?)

2)Enjolras is Grantaire's whipping boy. Same deal, Enjolras is hurt in front of him. Because Grantaire would be all too willing to bleed for Enjolras or in retaliation of his words, hurting Enjolras is more effective.

3)Both are whipping boy for the other. These two shits are the mouthiest punks their captors had ever met, but they hate seeing someone else pay for their words.

I like to see my men in distress."

Anyone interested?
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Re: E/R Whipping Boy Reprompt

(Anonymous)
WANT
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Words Like Barbed Wire (Anonymous) Expand
?

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